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Why I Quit My Dream Job

In December of 2011 I graduated with my MBA, and moved to Austin with Alex with no job.  Alex had an established job so it wasn't so scary moving cold turkey, but the unknown of not having a job worried me.  I searched for 2 weeks, and then one night in a Spec's liquor store the night before New Year's Eve, I met the co-founder of an Austin based tequila company.  We hit it off, and it just so happened 2 days later his marketing manager quit.  I never thought a position would have come out of our conversation that night, but everything does happen for a reason.

Sure enough I landed the job.  I was FREAKING out. When I moved to Austin I was looking for an industry that would be involved with social events and interact with other brands in the city.  The beverage industry was the perfect avenue.  I didn't have years and years of marketing experience, so I felt extremely blessed they hired me.  I was in charge of the entire marketing department, which consisted of me and a few interns, since it was a small company.  My ideas were mine, and I could execute them and see the results first hand.

After a few weeks with the company, I began to notice some interesting quirks with employees.  And as the months passed by, I began to realize that I had gotten myself in to something I didn't want to be a part of.  I won't go in to detail, but let's just say I felt like I was back in high school, but worse.

I became extremely stressed and to the point of feeling true depression.  I remember one weekend I went to visit my family for the weekend to help me take my mind off of work, and in the middle of playing with my nieces I began crying. For no reason. In the midst of a fun moment playing with my favorite girls, I felt so sad.  That's when I realized something was seriously wrong.  I vented to Alex every day, and to a certain point he couldn't take it anymore.  He wanted to help, but there was nothing he could do accept encourage me.  I needed the job, I was pregnant and couldn't quit.  I would take early morning walks and cry out to God to help me get through it, to make it better, to help me find a way out. Often, I would cry to and from work.  I couldn't sleep, eat, and I could never take my mind off of it.  The stress consumed me.

I finally decided after many fights with Alex, that after I left for maternity leave I would not return.  This was a huge decision for us as a family, not knowing when I would get another job, and needing money after just having a baby.  But we got through it, and 4 months later I received a job at State Farm.  Those 4 months were a struggle financially, but I had never been happier in my entire life.  The relief of not having to step in to that negative environment every day but rather spend that time with Turner instead was the best decision I ever made.

With all that said, sometimes I think "Wow, I had the perfect job. What the heck happened?" It really is a shame, because I love marketing and I enjoyed the work I did there, but in the end the people you are surrounded by truly affect your job.  I wish so badly it would have worked out, but the Lord definitely taught me a lot while I went through the storm.

Now, I am never stressed about work.  I go to work, come home, and leave my work at the office. That is the BEST feeling.  I may not have the most appealing job in the world, and it might not have the coolest title, but at the end of the day I love the people I work with, and I am happy.

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Have you faced a similar situation in your life? I'd love to hear about it!


3 comments:

kelsey williams said...

loved this story. it makes me sad to hear how depressed you were at your first job! were you looking for work immediately after turner was born, or were you going to try to be a stay-at-home mom?

Jesse Coulter said...

Thanks girl. I was hoping to find a part-time marketing position, but I couldn't find anything. So, full-time it was and in a completely different field. But hey, gotta go with the flow, right? I always wondered if I would want to stay home, but honestly after I went back to work I realized that I truly enjoy working and being a full time stay at home mom just isn't for me. I think your schedule is perfect!

Lauren Martin said...

A perfect post! Thanks for sharing the link girl! :D I don't think there is any reason for people to suffer in toxic environments. Jobs are out there for everyone, people just have to be motivated enough to make the change! good for you!

Xx
Lauren Jade
Lauren Jade Lately
'Simplify Life, Maximize Happiness'